Building Character in Kids

Merriam-Webster define character as "moral excellence and firmness". I love this definition. Firmness is such an important part of character. It means that even though you may practice moral excellence, you must also stand up for yourselves and others. I am the most proud of my daughter when she exhibts these qualities, not getting a 100 on her test, although that makes me happy too!

So where do our children learn character. Of course parents, educators and family play a major role, but what do they learn when we aren't influencing them? I know this is scary, but the average American child between the age of 8 and 18 spend almost 4 hours a day in front of the TV and another 2 hours in front of a computer (not including schoolwork) and video games. According to studies by the University of Michigan and Parents TV, the number of minutes parents spend in meaningful conversation with their children is 3.5! While children are watching 1,680 minutes of TV a week. As powerful and as great a role model as you may be, the time differential is much too great. We need to spend more time with our kids and they need to spend less time in front of the TV and video games. In future posts I will address some of these issues in greater detail, but what is the result of so much TV?

While I believe many of these tests are inconclusive, Dr. John Nelson of the American Medical Association reports that in 2,888 of 3,000 studies, TV violence is a "casual factor" in real life. When I sift through the research as to what that really means, I'll report back to you. And of course all this inactivity also leads to obesity. A National Health and Nutrition Examination Survey found a more than a 100% increase in obesity since the 1960's.

I'm digressing a bit from character, but I wanted show what we are up against if we allow our children to watch so much TV. I certainly don't want my daughter learning her ethics from "Zach and Cody" or "iCarly".

There are several organizations that have programs and information to help you with teaching your child ethics and character. Character Counts has seminars and performs research. You can order a survey for your school on the site as well. Another great site I found is the Utah Education Network. This site has classroom activities and strategies to improve character.If you click on "Class extensions" the "Strategies for empowering Students" you will see all of the classroom activities they have to offer. While it's nice that more and more schools are offering character building programs, the primary responsibility lies with parents. Many of these thought provoking exercises serve to reinforce what you have probably been stressing for years, but the excercise may strike a cord with your child and of course it is more quality time with your child.